There is a story about an old Cherokee chief who is teaching his grandson about life.
He tells him, "A fight is going on inside me. It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil. He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt and ego. The other is good. He is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. The same fight is going on inside of you and inside every other person too."
The grandson thinks about this for a minute and then turns to his grandfather and asks, "Which wolf will win?"
The wise chief turns to his grandson, smiles knowingly and replies simply, "The one you feed."
This gave me much happiness today, to read and consider. Nice to have truth in bold stripes, handed to you.
Life here continues, but not in such a dark realm. Looking forward to the end of my tenure at my current work gig, and to more freelance writing. I landed a freelance gig with Alternative Medicine mag, to begin next month or in Dec. I feel the fresh, cool breath of freedom blowing my way, and it is good. Fingers crossed the freelance continues to flow, and that doula-ing will pick up, with some effort.
Looks like school in in my future, also. Master's Program in Prenatal & Perinatal Psychology. Scary as shite, but looking more and more likely as the new path.
It took me by surprise, really, just a week or two ago, I did a haphazard web search, and before I knew it, I was on the phone with the head of the college. Just like when I decided to become a doula. Done. In classes, next!
Feels right and good and supported by something far larger than me. Funny how we only partially are in control of it all. Seems like those spirits that are watching out for us are just waiting for us to discover the next thing, like good parents, patient, not forcing or helping until you make it to the "aha!" Then, whooooosh! Get the hell out of the way. Suddenly, you've got everything you could possibly need to succeed.
Is good.